Lately the words that I hear, <br />They sever and hurt my ears. <br />They cut through my heart <br />And pierce my soul. <br />Vulgarity poisons my spirit <br />And sharpens the twisting knife. <br />These words that harm me <br />Come from one I hoped loved me. <br />For years I have not known you <br />Nor have you known me. <br />Through pictures, looks were exchanged. <br />Through sporadic phone calls, <br />Voices were understood. <br />This was the extent of our relationship. <br />You, the distant Disneyland dad. <br />Me, the far away child-no-more. <br />I don't understand why you say what you say. <br />Do you mean to hurt me or <br />Are you just that way? <br />Did you know I'm sensitive about my clothes, <br />My hair, and the way I look? <br />Did you know feet bother me for no reason at all? <br />And excessive criticism makes me feel very small? <br />You laugh at my quirks <br />And the way that I talk. <br />You misunderstand everything I say <br />You won't let me explain <br />Before you begin to complain. <br />All this and still. Still. <br />Still I love you, still. <br />I have never known <br />What a dad is. <br />Whether you're at fault, <br />I know not. <br />I only know we've been given chance two. <br />A chance to fix what doesn't have to <br />Always stay with me. <br />I've always wanted a father. <br />I've dreamed of any male figure. <br />I chose you and you chose me. <br />Not on purpose, of course, but it was meant to be. <br />God makes no mistakes, <br />Though at times I've wondered. <br />I want you as my father. <br />Will you take me as you daughter? <br />I want you to know the truth: <br />That through all your faults, <br />I know that I'm not perfect either. <br />God forgave me, <br />So I forgive you. <br />I'll always love you and wish for your love. <br />My promise to you and to my Father above.<br /><br />Chelsea Petty<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/dear-distant-dad/
