I do have an enormous sense of self control <br />no matter what the guys might think <br />the ones who were drinking at the shoreline bar Saturday <br /> as I half fell into the lagoon <br />and had to be dragged into the dingy by Phil <br /> the new dive instructor in town <br />you see I had planned to get drunk the previous night <br />in fact I hadn’t stopped drinking <br />(since the previous night and there I was half wet in a dingy <br />hitching a ride around the corner) <br /> <br />I do have an enormous sense of self control <br />and my confessions of self denial on the Friday <br />proves this undoubtedly as it was on the Friday <br />late that I tore at my face <br />to reveal underskin blisters of inadequacy <br />hidden for three years past <br />there are no mirror in my house <br /> so I had done to another’s to see <br />(where my reflection sadly looked like me <br />and not some other person I could ignore) <br /> <br />I do have an enormous sense of self control <br />despite what my cousin or best friend might say <br />if by chance you should see them together <br />and ask them about me but that’s a huge <br />presumption on my part to think you have the time <br />or the inclination to know <br />and I may still fall into the lagoon or lose my shoes <br />in your presence one warm dark night <br />(when the stars are bright and when marlin have been caught <br />think of my action as a celebration) <br /> <br />I do have an enormous sense of self control <br />although I have taken flagrant liberties with those I should not <br />because my greed is always rationed <br />giving me bitesized pleasure <br />enabling a way of living free from vicarious pleasure <br />a life that holds each moment <br />and through momentary cleansing wet legs lost shoes and underskin blisters <br />I am celebrating my own pulse <br />(…. <br /> …)<br /><br />J.L. Nash<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/pulse-12/
