(Byron's governess, May Gray, would come to bed with him at night <br />and 'play tricks with his person'. According to Byron, this 'caused <br />the anticipated melancholy of my thoughts—having anticipated life') . <br /> <br />I lay awake, most every night, <br />Tucked in my bed at Aberdeen, <br />And waited for that footstep light, <br />My Governess, my Demon Queen. <br /> <br />I was but nine, or ten at most <br />When she climbed underneath my sheet, <br />I heard her breathing in my head <br />Her hands, ice cold about my feet. <br /> <br />And she would whisper soft to me <br />Would play strange tricks to rouse me there, <br />My teeth would chatter in my sleep, <br />Across my face, her perfumed hair. <br /> <br />Her lips were red, would seek my mouth <br />And I would gasp to catch each breath, <br />While she would threaten, 'make no sound, <br />Or you may seek the shades of death! ' <br /> <br />Then she would mount, and raise her gown <br />And smother me beneath her sex, <br />While I would, desperate, look around <br />No Saviour came, no God protects! <br /> <br />My mother's alcoholic breath <br />Lay snoring in her favourite chair, <br />She called me lame, a little brat, <br />I saw no mother's instinct there. <br /> <br />The Governess, May Gray abused, <br />And beat me almost every day, <br />What chance had I to live and love <br />With women, in the normal way? <br /> <br />I lived, anticipated life <br />Before that I was even ten, <br />And so I rated womankind, <br />I loved and cursed them, even then. <br /> <br />So judge me not! My life was filled <br />With scandals that re-crossed my path, <br />And Caroline was most unkind <br />When she composed my epitaph. <br /> <br />She wrote the words you know me by <br />Once I had sought to let her go, <br />She sat in silence, scrawled the words, <br />'Mad, bad, and dangerous to know! ' <br /> <br />30 May 2010<br /><br />David Lewis Paget<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/diabolick/
