A shining beam is what you are <br />Or should I say you were, <br />I can't remember much today <br />It all seems like a blur. <br /> <br />Inside I've gone against the grain <br />of morals I have known, <br />righteous values vowed and cherished <br />sewn into my soul. <br /> <br />Now how do I repair the seams <br />that snagged onto a nail, <br />when everything I hoped would be <br />I knew could not prevail. <br /> <br />The nails from the cross I bore <br />in behalf of Holy names, <br />unraveled faith to numb my soul <br />still, I take all the blame. <br /> <br />For every moment I'm awake <br />there's gnawing on my bones, <br />a slave engraved with memories <br />like etchings on a stone. <br /> <br />So now I see no way to win <br />How can I even hope to mend <br />when I'm a walking mannequin <br />who's pondering anesthesia. <br /> <br />To rage and ooze, forget and lose <br />either way, what I will choose <br />will lead to pain, to drugs or booze <br />now that I seek amnesia. <br /> <br />© S.E.S<br /><br />Sara Stowell<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/amnesia/
