They say at the root of all addictions <br />Is the search for wholeness, <br />Or more accurately, the need <br />To fill in the hole, we all have inside. <br />I have to admit, some days <br />This hole seems the size of <br />The Grand Canyon and I keep <br />Trying to find the one thing, <br />The one person, the one vice <br />That is going to make me feel <br />Complete. <br />But the thing is, that doesn’t happen. <br />The more you try to fill in the hole, <br />The bigger it gets, <br />The more it consumes what’s left of you. <br />It takes a while, to recognize this, <br />To realize that instead of digging yourself out, <br />You’re digging yourself deeper. <br />That you are the one with the shovel, <br />Making it all worse. <br />It’s hard to get out of your own way. <br />Hard to ask for the rope to pull yourself out. <br />Hard to admit that the hole inside of you <br />Is beyond your ability to repair, or hide. <br />That is when you learn humility. <br />That is when you find out who your friends are, <br />The ones who will throw you the rope, <br />Reach down with a hand and pull you up. <br />Or stand on the edge of the void <br />With their own shovels and help you <br />Fill it all in, until your strong enough <br />To climb out on your own. <br />I know I’m not the only one, <br />With this hole inside. <br />Not the only one battling demons <br />And trying to find my way home, <br />Make myself whole. <br />So, throw me a rope here, help me now, <br />And I promise to return the favor <br />When your time comes.<br /><br />Sandra Brennan<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/whole-4/
