I want to create beauty in desperation <br />To write and have my pencil cry <br />Stain my paper-mache emotions <br />But I have no soul <br />No deep-embedded sympathy <br />With which to make me bleed <br />Only hollow words <br />And shallow analogy <br />I have acquired the intelligence... <br />The brain... <br />The intellect... <br />But I have not the ability to feel what I'm writing <br />Therefore, I cannot relate <br />No wonder I am not gotten <br />Misunderstood anguish <br />So unbelievable <br />So quickly I abandon in dispair <br />I want to believe <br />To understand <br />Deeper than the ocean in which I am drowning myself <br />I need a connection <br />From my paper to the pen <br />From the pen to my arm <br />From my arm to my mind <br />From my mind <br />To my heart <br />Where I may bleed emotion out through said pen <br />In empathetic ink <br />Not sold on God's green earth <br />To become that which I can be <br />To become that which I must be <br />My aptitude <br />My fate <br />My destiny<br /><br />Amanda Saveley<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/searching-for-meaning-in-words/
