My life is in front of me <br />I do not possess the skill to pass judgment on myself <br />I can only paint a sketch of it <br />I ran after happiness and thought I found it <br />When she looked at me something passed from her to me <br />I was never the type to cling to anything <br />But when I Iost her I lost half of myself <br />I sit calm as time is dying dropp by drop <br />As if life had no value <br />I have never looked at death in the eye <br />Though I had all my life to do so <br />Does everything end? <br />The sun casts nervous shadows on the wall as I sit on my <br />Bed turned tomb <br />I want to bebrave but I don’t know how <br />My destination seems so far away in a dimension with no name <br />I soak up time as the evening does the dun <br />I weep with pity for myself <br />But with no intention of it being an errand of mercy <br />How does a solitary man attain himself? <br />The only sin I’ve committed was lack of imagination <br />As I prepare to dive into the darken depths of death <br />As I fumble with container of multi-colored death inducers <br />I tremble to untrack the safety cap <br />In despair the cotton slips from the grasp of my fingertips <br />And is pushed in to the narrow neck closing off the mouth of death <br />Shutting off what may have been my last breath <br />I laughed so hard I cried<br /><br />Alfred Ramos<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/my-last-suicide-note/
