Today, I am nearly six. <br />I am ten steps up the stair, looking in <br />Through the parlour door at a party. <br /> <br />I am bad as bad can be. <br />I have not been the perfect hostess, <br />Sweet as a chocolate smarty. <br /> <br />I am a black shark's fin on a chintzy china sea. <br />A Shirley Temple of girls is worshipping my cake. <br /> <br />I have dreaded this day all week. <br />Mother is raging. 'The things I do for your sake, <br />No nice pink frock when I was wee. <br />You could pretend to be grateful. <br />The hours I've spent on invites, icing, games, <br />Sulk then. Go sit on the stair. <br />We'll have a party without you. <br />Don't blame me if the others call you names.' <br /> <br />Today, I am newly six. <br />A circus of giggling girls <br />Is ritually passing the parcel, <br />Is whooping and laughing and yelling. <br /> <br />I am ten steps up the stair. <br />I am bad as bad can be. <br />From my two bad eyes, two hot wet tears are spilling. <br />I am wrapping my arms round my sides to hug me better. <br /> I want to rub myself out, like a squiggly letter. <br /> <br />In my two bad eyes, the sadness drops keep filling.. <br />I am dressed like a lamb on a sacrificial plate. <br />The jellies are spiked with spite, are laced with hate. <br /> <br />I am newly six. I am bad as bad can be, <br />Sitting way out on a limb, at six, sixteen or sixty, <br />Feet of clay, and a heart of rusty tin, <br />Ten steps up the stair, <br />On the outside, looking in.<br /><br />sheena blackhall<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/birthday-30/
