Whiskey Stevens was the best <br />damn piano (but say it pi-ana) player <br />I ever met: even with that missing pinkie <br />Whiskey though like most pirates (even the ones never seen a ship) <br />he wouldn't lay off that rum <br />which is funny since his nickname was <br />Whiskey but <br />he swore it was his given first name <br />and shouldn't define the kind of drink he <br />liked <br />By the time he met Long John Sally <br />who used to be a woman of ill repute <br />but now was a run and gunslinger with a revolver <br />in her boot <br />his liver was already shot to hell <br />pickled and rotten <br />and she was a hacking up clods of greasy blood <br />from what they called THE consumption <br />(consumption junction, won't long function!) <br />Well Whiskey thought he was gonna get lucky <br />but Long John Sally just wanted to try their luck <br />at a poker game <br />so she sat Whiskey down and made the stakes <br />higher than an opium den junkie <br />He had the better cards but he also made a crude <br />joke about Poker (but say it Poke-her) <br />and Sally whipped out her revolver <br />faster on the draw than poor Whiskey Stevens <br />hammered on the hammer AND A GOOD GA'LL DAMN <br />and poor Whiskey didn't die from liver <br />failure but head-staying-in-one-piece failure <br />Sally ain't got an ounce or pint or any other <br />measurement of remorse and laughs and laughs <br />but THE MAN UPSTAIRS gets the last laugh <br />because the laughin' started up a coughing fit <br />her last and worst <br />and she comes crashing down on the table stone <br />dead <br />cards and chips flying to the heavens <br />and Whiskey and Sally flying down to hell<br /><br />Smack Thompson<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/if-i-made-a-cowboy-movie-it-would-be-like-this-and-you-d-love-it/
