I bought a tube of glue, the crazy type, <br />the day before Christmas, believing all the hype. <br />I'll fix our broken treasures, I told my wife to be, <br />nothing could be easier, just you wait and see. <br />Starting with a coffee cup, it's handle I replaced, <br />shaking it with pride, to the floor it quickly raced. <br />Bouncing off her knee, then landing on her toe, <br />she screamed in utter pain, as I dodged her glancing blows. <br />Regaining our composure, we started project two, <br />the fixing of a picture, two drops and we'd be through. <br />Charging up beneath it, she knocked me from my stool, <br />the picture isn't straight, you stupid little fool. <br />The picture had now fallen, her painful cries I heard, <br />I watched her hit the floor, much like a wounded bird. <br />Not sure what I should do, I decided I would run, <br />she was screaming bloody murder, looking for her gun. <br />Running to the driveway, I hopped into the van, <br />all the while she was screaming, come take it like a man. <br />She slammed into the door, as I stomped down on the gas. <br />naked as a Jaybird, face pressed upon the glass. <br />Quickly backing up, I shifted into drive, <br />I put the pedal to the metal, hoping to survive. <br />She kept up pretty well, for a mile, maybe more, <br />that's when I heard her scream, she was glued to the door. <br />Not taking any chances, I sped to higher speeds, <br />trying to ensure, my speed would meet my needs. <br />I told her Merry Christmas, with a smile on my face, <br />then hit the other pedal, and launched her into space. <br /> <br />Copyright 2013<br /><br />Richard Shores<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/crazy-cristmas/
