For twelve years I have not been pregnant <br />Yet one hundred and forty four times I have thought so. <br />Even when the only way was through immaculate conception. <br />Each month I find myself wishing to bleed or not to bleed. <br /> <br />Therein lies the greatest difference between adam and eve <br />The possibility of nuturing creation in one's womb. <br />The miracle of life is too often distanced from the male <br />Taken from him when he withdraws, spent and empty. <br /> <br />Not so for the female, unless you're a seahorse, of course. <br />Men shy away from pain, mostly, women sometimes wish for it. <br />The belly swells in a heavy pregnant-like pose <br />Breasts become tender and full in readiness. <br /> <br />Every month we are reminded we are the carriers of the next generation. <br />Those that do not want the time to be now <br />Are cruelly flooded with hormones that attract and yearn <br />For the beautiful act that can make it possible. <br /> <br />Contraception is never a guarantee that you will not be gifted <br />By the great universe to nuture the future in your arms. <br />This twenty first century fucking frenzy will soon subside <br />And return to an act of love with pitiful cries. I hope. <br /> <br />Meanwhile, I shall continue to be reminded of my womanhood <br />By a week of pain, nagging doubt and emotional fragility. <br />Until my so-called curse comes calling with the new moon <br />And I often wonder to myself, what reminds the male of his essential part in creation?<br /><br />Clare McWilliams<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/every-month-date-written-04-02-2008/
