Dozens of women chase after my half brother. <br />He only has half the hair that I do because he has a human mother. <br />Lots of women jump his bones because of his lack of hair. <br />Not even one of them have jumped my bones and it's unfair. <br />Just for once I wish that I was the one who the women adore. <br />But they rip my brother's clothes off and I always get ignored. <br />I'm frustrated because of this anger that I harbor. <br />People say that can be fixed by a trip to the barber. <br />My brother keeps getting women; he's knocked up over twenty this year. <br />Because I'm nearing forty and am unmarried, my mom thinks I'm a queer. <br />I went to the doctor yesterday because I felt under the weather. <br />He said that I have virginitis which means I'll be a virgin forever. <br />My brother rubs it in when he and his ladies get together because they always have a hoot. <br />I may not have the women but at least I'm not the one who was just slapped with a paternity suit. <br /> <br />(THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM.)<br /><br />Randy Johnson<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/so-easy-a-caveman-can-do-it-ix-half-caveman/
