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Herbert Nehrlich - Ashes To Ashes

2014-11-07 5 Dailymotion

I laughed because I did not have <br />what it would take in normal times <br />to cry for him. I had not practiced, <br />after all, boys will be boys but they, <br />with few exceptions, sissy those, <br />do know the limits, tears are reserved <br />for others and for times when darkness <br />emulsifies all liquids emanating <br />from human orifices and from hell <br />on earth which hovers without pause <br />in all those niches and the cracks of joy. <br /> <br />I laughed because it was not me, <br />but him, that tyrant without kingdom, <br />the one whose slaves had flown the coop <br />so long ago, using the wings he had, <br />in painful and so logical precision <br />handcrafted and attached to them, <br />which really, should be 'us', oh yes, <br />it was perverted pleasure in the snow <br />when Johann dug the grave and winked, <br />we were old friends by now, for sure, <br />between the shovel and his sandwiches, <br />of bloodwurst and red beets, and lemonade. <br /> <br />What bothered me the most was a dilemma. <br />How much did they expect me to throw down <br />of dust to dust (I saw no ashes) as farewell, <br />well, with a heart that had been born and bred, <br />to honour generosity I took two scoops, <br />and went home happy for two reasons, <br />here revealed. I had been spared and Johann, <br />the gravedigger and friend, had smiled, <br />as if to say 'you're doing fine', I know that now. <br />At funerals you can't just talk among the dead <br />and in the presence of the Lord, so great, <br />I still think back to that strange day in fifty-three, <br />and wonder with a scoop of trepidation <br />when I will have to walk the walk to it again.<br /><br />Herbert Nehrlich<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/ashes-to-ashes/

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