Albert Potter isn't dead <br />It were just a bloody lie <br />In fact, apart from athlete's foot <br />he's as fit as you or I <br />but someone’s got it in for him <br />they told the papers he were gone <br />that he’d popped his clogs <br />turned up his toes <br />that his soul had “travelled on” <br />EE! This fairly vexed old Albert <br />By Gum he did get mad <br />It’s not as If I’m old he said <br />Well …..I’m younger than my dad <br />But people keep on telling him <br />“Aye up Lad, thou art dead, <br />it’s in yon paper in big print <br />you died peacefully in bed.” <br />They keep bringing wreaths and sentiments <br />And knocking on the door <br />But then of course he answers it <br />And confusion reigns once more. <br />If it’s a joke, It ain’t that funny <br />In fact it’s pretty sick <br />Oh Albert plays the whole thing down <br />But it’s getting on his wick <br />So he phoned the local paper <br />And said can you print that I’m not dead <br />And whilst I like the flowers and sympathy <br />Could folk bring me beer instead.<br /><br />Bill Mitton<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/albert-potter-is-not-dead/
