I will close my eyes to wake within my nightmare. <br />It is the inevitable fate that is called my destiny. <br />I will sleep and they will rob me of my consciousness. <br />They will rob me of my precious control. <br />I will be helpless, as I am helpless right now. <br />I weep wondering what will happen if I do not wake. <br />Will it break my precious children? <br />Will anyone mourn my passing? <br />What is the legacy I will leave behind? <br />Will they only remember the nightmares? <br />Will anyone see me, just once, as I am? <br />I sit, alone, in the quiet of the dark night. <br />Alone, undefended, when I want simply to be held. <br />I yearn for someone to lie to me and tell me all will be fine. <br />Give me an illusion I can hold onto. <br />Give me something that is tangible that I can't break. <br />Take the crumbling shards of my heart and mend them. <br />I don't care if the mends are jagged or ugly. <br />The beauty lies in the mending. <br />It is the trust of a broken soul given to another. <br />It is the burden of the damned I bear. <br />It is in silence that I scream. <br />It is in laughter that I mourn. <br />It is in my soul to live. <br />And it is my fate to transcend. <br />I will close my eyes… <br />And I will not wake. <br /> <br />Copyright 2006 A.J. McKinley<br /><br />A.J. McKinley<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/i-will-not-wake/
