For every shadow seen and heard <br />the winds change the day. <br />My memories past and present <br />will come at night to stay. <br /> <br />* <br />He told me to just dropp it <br />to move on and live in peace. <br />Yet for every night there is a nightmare <br />tearing up my dreams. <br /> <br />* <br />My heart is pained with anger <br />a feeling of deceit. <br />For I betrayed myself <br />I gave in to defeat. <br /> <br />* <br />I gave up my control <br />on that dark and dreadful night. <br />I gave up my soul <br />when I abandoned my fight. <br /> <br />* <br />I tried to stop him <br />honest. <br />I tried to tell him <br />no. <br /> <br />* <br />He just pushed me back down <br />told me very slow. <br />Sit back and be quiet <br />I could just break your neck. <br />I want a little fun <br />how about a little lick. <br /> <br />* <br />My heart turned upside down <br />as I cried out from the shooting pain. <br />But when he was through <br />he told me <br />he thought I liked it just the same. <br /> <br />* <br />Now give me your stupid hand <br />he said <br />As he yanked me off the bed <br /> <br />* <br />Told me to get dressed <br />smiled sweetly and said. <br />'What's wrong? Smile! <br />you look so distressed.' <br /> <br />* <br />When we went outside he scared me <br />gave me this piercing grin. <br />He made me feel like I was nothing <br />I could never win. <br /> <br />* <br />Now look into my eyes <br />do you see the shame that's hidden there? <br />Since that dreadful moment <br />I've been afraid to show I care. <br /> <br />* <br />Everything has changed <br />including my view of life. <br />Nothing looks the same <br />since I betrayed myself that night.<br /><br />Heather Kemper<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/self-betrayal/
