It is raining in Kingston-upon-Hull <br />But Queen Victoria is not amused. <br />Aloft on her plinth she proudly stares <br />Across the Square. She has been there <br />For nigh on a hundred years <br />Through two world wars, <br />When she and her sons and daughters <br />Survived the blitz and fought the foe. <br />She sent her children across the waters <br />Through storm and gale and over the waves <br />To rule an empire in her name <br />Despite all risks and dangers. <br />But now it is raining in Kingston-upon-Hull <br />Where monarchs guard <br />The august city’s ancient loos. <br /> <br />Queen Victoria’s loo has stood <br />For nigh on a hundred years, <br />An ever welcome comfort stop <br />For those who are in need. <br />Stone steps lead down to where, <br />As in a temple’s sanctum shine <br />The gleaming brass and porcelain <br />That’s welcomed generations. <br />Still free despite the Thatcher years <br />And always there when wanted. <br />Yet what is this? — The gates are locked — <br />The way is blocked to where the steps <br />And handrails lead down below, <br />Where we want to go. But see, the City Fathers <br />In a notice here address us — <br />We, sons and daughters of the Queen’s <br />Brave empire builders and adventurers <br />Who scoffed at risks and dangers. <br /> <br />“In the interests of health and safety, <br />These premises will be closed <br />During periods of rain <br />To prevent possible injury <br />Caused by slipping on wet steps.” <br /> <br />The Queen is not amused, <br />Nor are we!<br /><br />Pete Crowther<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/queen-victoria-is-not-amused/
