My wife rode that cockroach for everything it was worth <br />Chasing it out of 'her' kitchen through the house and into 'my' den <br />Where it laid on our newly installed stain resistant carpet <br />Squashed to death by a pacifist and altruistic size eight and a half B <br />Waiting for an autopsy to be preformed by me.... <br />The wife wants documentation and a full disclosure as to its sex <br />She wanted to know whether to expect <br />An invasion of little bastard creepy crawlers <br />I picked up the victim and resting it in the palm of my hand <br />I rolled it over and counted the segments on the ventral surface <br />Of the bug's depleted and vacated abdomen <br />Whereby I not only pronounced the bugger deceased <br />But I documented it was a female who had recently laid its larvae <br />Most likely in the carpet as it had been 'snug as a bug' and securely rolled <br />Before being installed in our pest free home.... <br />That is if you don't count my wife's bird Chubby <br />And an occasional visit from my mother in law.... <br />My wife didn't want to know anything but....how long will it take? <br />I explained to a distraught and anxious Insectophobia <br />The female contents herself with 'staying at home' <br />And calls to the male by emitting pheromones to attract her mate <br />'Oh my', said the wife....'They sound almost human' <br />I couldn't argue with that statement <br />Walking out the door to go to work I said, 'Call me later' <br />And I threw the dead bug to a bird sitting on my lawn <br />Who for lack of a better description <br />Looked like a blind squirrel searching for a nut <br /> <br />2007 © T Sheridan<br /><br />Ted Sheridan<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-cockroach-left-no-instructions-as-to-its-final-remains/
