Little Ballads Of Timely Warning; II: On Malicious Cruelty To Harmless Creatures <br />The cruelty of P. L. Brown— <br />(He had ten toes as good as mine) <br />Was known to every one in town, <br />And, if he never harmed a noun, <br />He loved to make verbs shriek and whine. <br /> <br />The 'To be' family’s just complaints— <br />(Brown had ten toes as good as mine) <br />Made Brown cast off the last restraints: <br />He smashed the 'Is nots' into 'Ain’ts' <br />And kicked both mood and tense supine. <br /> <br />Infinitives were Brown’s dislike— <br />(Brown, as I said, had ten good toes) <br />And he would pinch and shake and strike <br />Infinitives, or, with a pike, <br />Prod them and then laugh at their woes. <br /> <br />At length this Brown more cruel grew— <br />(Ten toes, all good ones, then had Brown) <br />And to his woodshed door he drew <br />A young infinitive and threw <br />The poor, meek creature roughly down, <br /> <br />And while the poor thing weakly flopped, <br />Brown (ten good toes he had, the brute!) <br />Got out his chopping block and dropped <br />The martyr on it and then propped <br />His victim firmly with his boot. <br /> <br />He raised his axe! He brandished it! <br />(Ye gods of grammar, interpose!) <br />He brought it down full force all fit <br />The poor infinitive to split— <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br />* <br />(Brown after that had but six toes! <br /> <br />Warning <br /> <br />Infinitives, by this we see. <br />Should not he split too recklessly.<br /><br />Ellis Parker Butler<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/little-ballads-of-timely-warning-ii/
