Don’t ask me to <br />just, be myself <br />I want to be much more than myself <br /> <br /> <br />I was the first delivered <br />after I split my mother in two. <br />She did not stop screaming <br />even after I came through. <br />To date we suffer from bipolar disorder <br />splitting mania and depression <br />intermittently in no particular order <br /> <br />The rent of the womb for months ten <br />I repaid with emotions, <br />mother never owned then <br />Still I lie, connected to placenta <br />that refuses to be stripped <br />letting the real me escape and survive. <br />I seek the liquid to breathe and stay alive <br /> <br />Carried on raindrops <br />that burn to dissipate petrichor. <br />I wish to sit atop the last, every, rainbow <br />to look across, over, the other shore. <br />This world was born coloured red <br />wonder if, the other side <br />is monochromatic dread... <br /> <br /> <br />I want to be everything <br />that I never became <br />And all that everything, I never will become.<br /><br />O Sudhir Janardhanan<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/deliverance-maybe/
