I realise my only hope <br />Is to find some kind of way to cope <br />With the guilt that hounds me from within, <br />But I'm paralysed by a sense of sin. <br />When I was younger things were good, <br />I loved my children like I should, <br />I read them stories when they went to bed, <br />They loved me too (that's what they said) . <br />The years have passed and I'm getting old; <br />It's funny how your heart grows cold <br />'Cos now I don't care one little bit <br />About the family and that sh*t <br />Who married me and destroyed my life <br />By persuading me to be his wife. <br />He made me feel like I didn't exist <br />Although he squeezed me when we kissed, <br />He shattered every innocent dream <br />And when I wake at night I scream. <br />There's no-one now who can explain <br />Why the nightmares come again and again, <br />They'll never understand my pain <br />And my awful fear of going insane.<br /><br />John Thorkild Ellison<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/a-bad-mother-grieves/
