I want you to tell me that you need me- <br />is that so hard? <br /> <br />I want you to see me and not turn away. <br /> <br />I carve sometimes even a gentle glance <br />or better <br />a soft touch and softer voice saying <br />'are you ok? ' <br /> <br /> <br />Rejection cuts like a dull knife <br />and kindness is a hurtful stranger <br />when not freely given and often <br />even if a substitute <br />for love <br />abandoned <br /> <br />Seeing you retreat inward <br />crushes my soul <br />and make me feel weak- <br />to weak to make it stop- <br />too weak to reach out- <br />and draw you out- <br />to weak to even cry sometimes. <br /> <br />No greater pain <br />than the pain of feeling unloved; <br />no greater din <br />than the din of silence. <br /> <br />No arm shorter than <br />the one which one <br />which wants to reach out <br />but is always too short from the lover in retreat <br />no hand ghostlier than the one which reaches out just after you have turned away. <br /> <br />So sex even is spiritless <br />yet it is better than <br />the cigarettes and beer <br />haze in which I sometimes find you <br />at three am TV snowing. <br /> <br />Worse, for any woman <br />or any man <br />beyond even all this <br />is the unmistakable sense <br />that you long for that something else <br />foraging with your eyes <br />to some stranger passer-by; <br />and I cannot re-direct <br />those longing looks <br />back my way <br />intoning in my soul; <br />'Don't you see <br />I am the one who loves you.' <br /> <br />We are the ghost ship <br />drifting upon the dead sea <br />and yet <br />curse me for the time being- <br />I'd rather drift in this maelstrom <br />with you <br />than anyone else; <br /> <br />so deep is my love.<br /><br />Lonnie Hicks<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/shelia-loves-deeply/
