In this moment I feel as if I am falling, <br />Into a prison from nowhere, <br />I see my shadow arabesque as <br />I watch my reflection appear <br />In a river of never abating madness- <br />Hiding from all that is real, <br />Moments have passed since I lay upon <br />A cold metal table, <br />Drifting off to sleep, and <br />Upon awakening- <br />I remember nothing, except for <br />The sensation of falling <br />From nowhere into nothingness- <br />As I watch the sun rising, <br />Outside of a picture window, <br />I find myself alive in some different place in time. <br />I feel my heart pounding <br />As is it were trying to escape <br />From a prison of iron bars inside of my chest, as <br />My brain spins about <br />As it were riding a horse on a merry-go –round, <br />It’s motor somehow <br />Rapidly accelerating <br />As that horse bobs up and down <br />Exacerbating my fear- <br />I hear myself screaming <br />In the midst of deadly silence- <br />The sun has now risen high over the mountains outside. <br />Within my utmost fantasies, <br />I am climbing my own mountain, <br />Hoping to reach the sky although <br />I cannot escape that merry-go-round of terror- <br />Except that I know now <br />I cannot hide from all that is real, <br />I shall never touch the sky and as <br />I find myself falling off of this make believe mountain- <br />I can see my shadow more clearly and <br />As I fall into a river of my fantasies, <br />I swim to the bank of this river from nowhere, <br />Leaving the madness behind-<br /><br />Claudia Krizay<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/electroconvulsive-therapy-2/
