Research suggests that managers spend up to a third of their time having difficult conversations with employees – but they’re regularly cited as one of the things they dislike the most about their job. <br /> <br />We’ve picked out five of the most common mistakes that we make when having a difficult conversation – and handy some tips on how to avoid them. <br /> <br /> <br />1. Mistake #1: We fall into a combat mentality <br />When difficult conversations go wrong, it's often because we've gone into combat mode and see the conversation as a battle that we’ve got to win. So set aside the battle fatigues and start looking for solutions. <br /> <br />2. Mistake #2: We oversimplify the problem <br />If the problem you’re facing were straightforward, then chances are you wouldn’t be where you are now. Take the time to dig a little deeper and get to grips with the real issues. <br /> <br />3. Mistake #3: We don't have enough respect <br />Don’t be tempted to trivialize matters or dismiss the person’s feelings just because you wouldn’t react in the same way. Always to try to respect the person and the problem. <br /> <br />4. Mistake #4: We let our emotions get the better of us <br />Emotions like fear, anger or embarrassment can easily derail a conversation. So always keep your cool, state what you really want and focus on the outcome you want to achieve. <br /> <br />5. Mistake #5: We over-rehearse <br />If we think a conversation is going to be difficult, we tend to start rehearsing what we’re going to say. So while some preparation is a good thing, try to resist the temptation to plan too much – the conversation may well take you by surprise. <br /> <br />Learn how to turn that tough talk into a constructive dialogue with Dealing with difficult conversations from Skill Boosters.
