My mind's a kaleidoscope, it thinks too fast <br />Blurs all the colors 'til I can't see past <br />The last mistake, the choice I made <br />Staring in the mirror with myself to blame <br />Sometimes I'm afraid of the thoughts inside <br />Nowhere to hide inside my mind <br />I'm scared that you'll compare and I'll look a lifetime past repair <br />I second guess myself to death, I re-solicit every step <br />What if my words are meaningless? What if my heart's misleading this? <br />I try to capture every moment as it comes to me <br />Bottle up the memories and let them keep me company <br />When the hope of morning starts to fade in me <br />I don't dare let darkness have its way with me <br />And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight <br />I will not be giving in tonight <br />When I'm old and grey, or thirty, or whatever happens first, <br />I'll need you to reassure me I didn't waste a verse <br />Or worse, what if my life's work is reduced to just myself <br />Like never let you get a word in, while I dissect my mental health <br />Or lack thereof, whatever, there's too many things to track <br />I really can't remember if I'm insane or insomniac <br />Now days, all the kids want crazy, wanna diagnose themselves <br />Trade up made up epidemics, pass around prescription pills <br />But my disorder can't be cured by a bottle, blade, or dose <br />Self-disgust and selfishness tend to hold me awfully close <br />But I don't wanna let you see that, I don't want my friends to know <br />Self-disgust and selfishness take me everywhere I go <br />When the hope of morning starts to fade in me <br />I don't dare let darkness have its way with me <br />And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight <br />I will not be giving in tonightTry as I might to keep it together <br />Why is recovery taking forever <br />Fool the whole world, just until I get better <br />I'm terrified I'll be faking forever <br />On and on I wonder what went wrong inside my head <br />I don't have to have the answers, but tonight I wish I did <br />All the pain I can't explain away won't fade <br />All the the secrets silenced by the shame <br />Don't make me say it <br />When the hope of morning starts to fade in me <br />I don't dare let darkness have its way with me <br />And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight <br />I will not be giving in tonight
