Lyrics:<br /><br />What Was I Doing This Morning<br /><br />What was I doing this morning?<br />I walked out the door and went for a swim<br />I was hunting for something but I don’t remember what it was<br />I looked for a list but it wasn’t in my pocket<br />I tried to organize my folders <br />But where were they hanging<br />I meant to pick up my kids but I forgot to have them<br />I tried to do my job but was drawing unemployment<br />I tried to walk but lost my legs in battle<br />I headed to my gym, but had no membership<br /><br />I tried to drive my car but had no fuel<br />I tried to eat lunch at four thirty<br />I tried to fall asleep while the sun was speaking<br />I tried to walk my cat but it lost its paws<br />I tried to play guitar but had sold the strings<br />I tried to make a call in seventeen eighty three<br />I tried to hear a song with my eardrums punctured<br />I put on my boxing gloves to run a marathon<br />I tried to read but the language was dead<br />I tried to watch the game but it was out of season<br />I went to vote in a dictatorship<br /><br />I tried to dance but the audience was hardlined<br />So I said a prayer but the god had hung up<br />I built a fire but no sticks were invented<br />I tried to bleed but was without a heart<br />I even tried to write with no utensil<br />And take a test without going to class<br />My bird watching days were going poorly on Mercury<br />I wanted to ride the wave in the forest<br />And collect timber from the coral reef<br />I bought a promise of a kangaroo in Sweden<br />Then hopped on an ocean liner to Lesotho<br /><br />I tried to get a visa to Zaire<br />And tried to travel without any papers<br />And checked out of prison without doing any time<br />I showed up to court without my lawyer<br />After I tried to argue my case without a defense<br />I tried to build a fort with no walls<br />And a castle inside of a valley<br />I tried to fly away without any wings<br />And design a zoo without any animals<br />And an observatory with no telescope<br />A window with no glass<br />And a gymnasium with no sports<br /><br />I wanted to pass off as British with no English<br />Have a barbeque with no grill<br />And eat pasta with no sauce<br />Clean the floor with no mop<br />Turn the door with no handle<br />Fire someone without being the boss<br />Get the mail with no deliveries<br />Punch a dude with no violence<br />Get married without a commitment<br />And ride a bike with no pedals<br />Teach without lessons<br />Be a historian with no history<br /><br />When I got started on one task<br />Another one stampeded in and shook<br />My whole room with knocked me out<br />Of my chairless seat and onto the rug<br />With no fabric which sprained my ankle<br />With no muscles and tendons and my bones<br />With no marrow connected to my back<br />Which was without a vertebrae or spine<br />Oh yes, I remember what I was doing<br />This morning I was planning to straighten everything out<br />So I grabbed the newest ruler and snapped it<br />
