Partial Lyrics:<br /><br />Joel<br /><br />When I was coming down the slide<br />He said hey have you heard this song<br />I just looked at him like a stranger<br />He started singing just come along<br />I hadn’t heard lyrics like that before <br />Ones that praised the slacker<br />The one I’d been raised to abhor<br />And it struck me quite like a firecracker<br />I memorized all the words<br />And then twenty years later I still dwell<br />In a world where whenever I hear it<br />I think of when I was introduced to the boy named Joel<br /><br />I watched him bloody himself<br />Fall off and break his arm<br />I was alarmed since I hadn’t seen<br />Joel fall into such a charm<br />He smiled as he recounted the deed<br />Though to be real there were tears that day<br />Even though he’d like us to forget that<br />As if we hadn’t seen his time of dismay<br />One’s body can be broken and still<br />They can have their pride not dispel<br />No worries it’s only my bones<br />Could only be said by one named Joel<br /><br />One day Joel told us he’d changed<br />Or at least his last name was another<br />When we asked him why he did it<br />From the truth he told us he was further<br />But I could appreciate the need for being fresh<br />I know a time or two I had entertained the thought<br />Of burning my ID and all my cards<br />And becoming someone that was previously naught<br />Except for him I didn’t notice a difference <br />Just a name easier to spell<br />So he didn’t have to keep explaining <br />Himself to anyone other than he was named Joel<br /><br />A paralyzed lizard climbed over a rock<br />Chasing a cricket for its dinner<br />Joel stomped on it and I was ashamed<br />At the laughter that arose from this sinner<br />To take a life is a sacred thing<br />But he responded animals are mechanical<br />And they were placed on earth for our desires<br />But I thought even if true, it’s tyrannical<br />How do you treat what’s under your feet<br />Whether it’s moving or a just a shell<br />Though I never verbalized it properly<br />Because it’s not cool to disagree with the guy named Joel<br /><br />He often tended to be quite cruel<br />In my direction he’d throw an undercut<br />And make me reconsider his company<br />When I’d take another punch in the gut<br />Physical strength and size are the laws<br />That govern small tight communities<br />And Joel dominated in those categories<br />So I tried to escape when I had opportunities<br />He’d shove you in the ground for a nickel<br />And forsake you forever for a spell<br />If it meant he might earn some quarter<br />Because that’s what it meant for him to be Joel<br /><br />My tears dried when he packed his gear<br />And said I’m moving over the hill<br />Looking for something a little sweller<br />Though to drop by I of course will<br />I enjoyed the peace and dreaded the war<br />While he tried to rule from afar<br />His minions never mentioned him in absence<br />Even though when he was close he was tsar<br />I saw it took no power to betray<br />And it took infinity to keep people in a cell<br />This very important lesson about power<br />And its relationships I learned from a man named Joel<br /><br />When he started tinkering with tools<br />I knew we were all in for something<br />He had a taser that could shock you<br />When he’d sneak up behind you, he’d give you a sting<br />For kicks he’d get you
