I meditate. I think a lot. I've became addicted to it. It's sort of an obsession. ... looking also as an addiction. I study the concept of illusory, but no matter what i always end up into the illusion. Feeling without a compass. Not ... just lost. ... but extremely lost. Of course ... all was induced of the fact that ... i had realised that no matter what direction i might follow ... all was the opposite of what i've wanted ... and actually a pathless path. So ... yeah ... i am the profile experiencing life as a disappointment ... but paradoxically still suffering of this incurable disease called optimism ... i continue hoping. Hoping of a better tomorrow. ... one that never comes. Meanwhile ... i express all those thoughts, emotions and feelings from inside of me... writing and writing. Trying to analyse and define this weird dynamic ... still expecting that i might find a solution to redefine the scenario of this damn life ... but unfortunately still living in hell In despair. A non ending torture. A nonsense
