A tenor, all singers above <br />(This doesn't admit of a question), <br />Should keep himself quiet, <br />Attend to his diet, <br />And carefully nurse his digestion. <br />But when he is madly in love, <br />It's certain to tell on his singing - <br />You can't do chromatics <br />With proper emphatics <br />When anguish your bosom is wringing! <br />When distracted with worries in plenty, <br />And his pulse is a hundred and twenty, <br />And his fluttering bosom the slave of mistrust is, <br />A tenor can't do himself justice. <br />Now observe - (SINGS A HIGH NOTE) - <br />You see, I can't do myself justice! <br /> <br />I could sing, if my fervour were mock, <br />It's easy enough if you're acting, <br />But when one's emotion <br />Is born of devotion, <br />You mustn't be over-exacting. <br />One ought to be firm as a rock <br />To venture a shake in VIBRATO; <br />When fervour's expected, <br />Keep cool and collected, <br />Or never attempt AGITATO. <br />But, of course, when his tongue is of leather, <br />And his lips appear pasted together, <br />And his sensitive palate as dry as a crust is, <br />A tenor can't do himself justice. <br />Now observe - (SINGS A CADENCE) - <br />It's no use - I can't do myself justice!<br /><br />William Schwenck Gilbert<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/the-disconcerted-tenor/
