The presents unwrapped from your favourite aunts <br />Some things that are useful like joke underpants <br />The unfortunate gifts that you put to one side <br />As ones for recycling and you're thinking that 'i'd <br />Never give those to my worst enemies' <br />The things that don't fit and worst of all these <br />Decorations for tables that some relative sent <br />And the perfume from Gladys that's so redolent <br />Of old ladies and bathrooms you know from your past <br />And the things that are broken and weren't made to last <br />The ties from your friends that are best now forgot <br />The after shave that instantly gave you those spots <br />Pink fluffy slippers that somebody gave <br />Franklin Mint replicas nobody saves <br />Those novelty items of dubious taste <br />Some chocolates smelling of wallpaper paste <br />Socks and pyjamas and boxed handkerchieves <br />Soaps and wax candles and cheap toiletries <br />The jersey from grandma who knows not your size <br />The joke books without any humour inside <br />Ah yes it is Christmas and throughout the land <br />We're all saying thankyou for things we can't stand.<br /><br />David Keig<br /><br />http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/unfortunate-presents/
